Pressures of Fame
by LifetimeTwilightLov
Summary: Jude Watson writes her Jedi Apprentice series and ObiWan is there to see it. First chapter: ObiWan's reaction to his newly found fame.
1. Chapter 1

I have NO idea how I came up with this idea, but I LOVE it, lol.

Disclaimer: We ALL know what it will say, so WHY bother?

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Pressures of Fame

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Obi-Wan Kenobi ran into the apartment he shared with his Master, Qui-Gon Jinn. He held a newspaper in his hand and was panting. "Master!" Obi-Wan called. "Master, come quick! You HAVE to see this!"

Qui-Gon walked out of the kitchen, looking a bit annoyed and fixed his apprentice with an annoyed look. "Well, what is it?" he asked.

"Look! I'm FAMOUS! See? This lady wrote a book ALL about me. It ranked number SIX on the galaxy's list. SIX! I'm a celebrity. Did you see it? I have to read this book. It must be REALLY good since it's all about me, right? I'm interesting. I mean, sure, sitting around here with you can be more than boring, but YOU are the boring one, not me. EVERYONE knows that or she wouldn't write a book about me."

Qui-Gon snatched the paper away from him and read the article, muttering annoyed words under his breath. "They were probably just amazed at how ridiculous you are," he said, handing his Padawan the paper back.

"What? How am I ridiculous, Master? Someone wrote a BOOK all about me. They say she's gonna make it a SERIES too. That must mean I'm EXTRA interesting and hip."

"Have you ever heard of the man named Stupid Elmer?"

"No, but I've heard the words before. Remember when I was like two? I had used to have a teddy bear named Elmer. I got him in Colorado when you took me on the vacation. Of course, you locked me in the bathroom most of the time because you were tired of me talking. I never understood that. I VERY rarely talk. And besides, that's no reason to lock a poor, innocent, cute little kid like me in a BATHROOM. My gosh, Master, that place stunk so bad I could—" 

"I was speaking, Padawan!" Qui-Gon exclaimed, rolling his eyes. "Stupid Elmer was a very historical idiot! And there are HUNDREDS of books about him. He was the man that tried nearly two billion times to create a LIGHTSABER out of LEAVES and failed all of the times. Though he made some quite beautiful wreaths."

"OHHH! Yeah, I saw those at Walmart once. I LOVE that one with the blue toy lightsabers. I was seriously considering buying one for my room. I thought it'd be cool because it matches my lightsaber and it goes GREAT with my boxers."

"OBI-WAN! Do you EVER stop talking?"

"I very rarely talk, Master. I thought we went over this. Now back to me being famous. Isn't this cool? I mean, people are going to be wanting AUTOGRPHS now…" his voice trailed off. "Where's the phone book?" he demanded urgently. "How am I going to sign autographs if I don't have any pictures of myself? I mean, REALLY! I need to find a photographer." He started to walk away, then paused and turned back to Qui-Gon. "Did I ever tell you about that one photographer I met on the streets of Tattooine? He was really fat, but he took glorious pictures of weird things. He photographs things like banthas. I always admired him for it. I mean, all those sand people around. He could've been killed HUNDREDS of times and he doesn't even carry a blaster. Of course, he carries some VERY heavy photography equipment that would be good for knocking someone out, but that's only fun when it breaks their skull. I've never done that though, but I heard it was VERY fun from Didi. He did it with a PAN once. He told me the story THOUSANDS of times. You should've heard it, Master. He was up against this HUGE guy, twice as tall as you, and about ten times fatter. And he actually knocked him out. Then the guy went to the doctor the next day when he woke up with a horrible headache and he had a cracked skull." Obi-Wan paused and began panting. "So exciting."

"Don't you need to find a photographer before your fans get here?" Qui-Gon asked to get rid of him.

"OH YEAH! I totally forgot, Master. Thanks for reminding me. You've always been really good at that. Where did you say the phone book was?"

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Tell me what you thought and I'll post the next chapter as soon as I can.


	2. Chapter 2

Thanks for the wonderful reviews! Here's the update.

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Qui-Gon walked down the peaceful halls towards his apartment. He was ready to relax after dealing with Obi-Wan all day. Obi-Wan was now gone away somewhere and Qui-Gon could have the whole afternoon to himself. When he neared his apartment, he heard the loud rap. He groaned. Why don't those helpless Masters learn to control their unruly Padawans? he grumbled to himself.

He unlocked his apartment door and entered. The music only got louder. Obi-Wan was in the main room dancing with a girl. He was dressed in baggy pants and a t-shirt that could easily have been work for a dress by any sized girl. Chains were around his neck, mingled together. Obi-Wan's ears were both pierced and had a diamond stud in each.

"OBI-WAN KENOBI!" Qui-Gon shouted.

Obi-Wan stopped dancing and ran over. "Oh, hi, Master. Came to join the party, did you? I'm a HUGE hit! You should've seen the girls lining up at the Temple door for my autograph. Gosh. I swear, if I have to deal with that every day, my hand is going to hurt ALL the time. I never knew being famous was so stressful."

"Who are the men in the suits?" Qui-Gon asked in annoyance.

"Oh! Those are my body guards. You see, Master, I guess someone wasn't too happy about something and they kinda pulled a gun on me. It was a highly dangerous matter and I kinda drew my lightsaber. I only cut off his arm, but it was able to be reattached."

"Why did you cut off his arm? YOU attacked HIM first!" Qui-Gon exclaimed angrily.

"Well, you see, Master, if I die, so many people will commit suicide. They won't have ME in the world. It's a very depressing matter." Obi-Wan made an embarrassed face and glanced around. "Just between you and me, Master, after I cut off his arm, I saw it was only a water gun. I felt horrible, honestly, but I couldn't let myself be put in such danger again. So I hired four body guards who are never to leave my sight. It's wonderful! I can even get 'em to do stuff for me. They cleaned your hair out of the shower!"

Qui-Gon rolled his eyes. "I already did that, Padawan!" he snapped.

"Oh, no, you didn't. My hair isn't THAT long and if I shed THAT much, I wouldn't even have a Padawan braid anymore. Trust me, it was YOUR hair."

"TURN OFF THAT BLASTED MUSIC!"

"NO! You see, this is my party. It was a surprise. My friends arranged it. This is the hottest new music. If I turned it off, it would be a bad thing for my publicity. It may start a cold hard and wrong rumor that I don't like cool music. You wouldn't want to ruin my good reputation would you?"

Qui-Gon rolled his eyes again as Obi-Wan went back to dancing. "What if I cut off your arm?" he said in annoyance.

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